But I am getting ahead of
myself. So let me rewind the tape a week
or so…
The week before my ordination
weekend, I was struggling. In fact, that
is an understatement. For whatever
reason, I was spent. Worn out. Dry. I
was exhausted physically, mentally tired, and spiritually malnourished. It was not pretty. It was terribly ironic since I would, just
a few days from then, be ordained and installed into a position of joy and
responsibility (one that involves carrying a lot of emotional weight and
requiring a reasonably healthy life). But
the fact still remained, I was tired and I didn’t know what to do about
it. And worse yet, I knew that I had a
weekend of shaking hands and kissing babies ahead and I wasn’t particularly
looking forward to it (nor did I think I had the energy to get through it
all). But God is good!
As people started arriving on
Thursday/Friday, something happened. I
began to see our out of-town guests differently. These weren’t people who were demanding from
me. Instead, they were giving. They didn’t expect me to entertain them. They were content to simply be here and to go
with the flow. In fact, they were
content to hang out with each other.
They began to share life with people from around the country that they
had never even met before. They
talked. They laughed. They told stories. They celebrated the Jesus who united them as
brothers and sisters. Like I said, God
is good!
And then it happened. One of those rare moments of clarity when God
allows you to see things differently.
One of our members calls these moments “God winks”. I just call them “thin moments”. On Saturday night I experienced one of these
thin moments.
I was standing on my deck grilling A
LOT of hamburgers for the 60 or so people who had come to our home to help
celebrate the weekend. It was hot. It was loud.
My timing was off (I was using a borrowed grill that I hadn’t yet bonded
with. Fellas, you understand…right?). People were waiting for food. They were hungry. And yet, no one seemed upset. They weren’t irritated. They seemed to understand. Maybe that isn’t stated strongly enough. They actually seemed to enjoy just being
together. Before I continue, you should
know that we had people from nine states.
People from all five “primary” chapters of our life. Some knew each other before the weekend…others
didn’t. And yet, they shared life on my
deck this past Saturday night as though they had known each other all of their
lives. It was pretty cool.
One of the guys from the seminary who
was celebrating with us came out to the grill and offered to take over for me
so that I could eat. And honestly, I
didn’t want to. I was feasting on
something else. It was God’s Spirit at
work in and through His people. It was a
glimpse of heaven right there on my deck.
It was satisfying. It was
good. God is good.
And then, shortly after, I was called
inside and given a few gifts.
Plaques. A painting. A few bottles of wine. A cross and communion kit. And…a book.
In the book were letters from people who wanted to join us for the event
but couldn’t. Later that evening I sat
and read their letters. Later that
evening I cried. Later that evening I
remembered that God is good. Are you
catching the theme of this post yet? God
is good. God is good. God is good.
Throughout this entire weekend, I
have seen evidence of the goodness of God.
The fact that He took a 25 year old loud-mouthed punk and helped extend
His kingdom in Tracy, CA, and touched people’s lives. The fact that He was at work in Indiana to
encourage struggling kingdom workers.
The fact that He has scattered people who know what it means to love in
His name across the country who are now helping others grow in that capacity to
love. God is good.
And I haven’t even touched on the
fact that this past Sunday was INCREDIBLE!
I got to hear my friend, Rev. Micah Miller, bring God’s Word to the
people of St. Andrew. Very cool. And then I got to worship in a packed room as
we celebrated God work in my ordination and installation. I got to hear my old friend, Rev. Jeff Dorth,
bring God’s Word and challenge us to run the race. I got to hear incredible music…including a
collection of dear friends who sang a special song. I got to be “vested” by my
father-in-law. I got to celebrate with
our St. Andrew family. I got to see
people who came in from all over the country just for the ordination service that
I haven’t seen (some of them, at least) in decades. God is good!
So. It is now Wednesday morning (it has taken me
longer to sit and write some of this down than I originally intended). I am still tired…but I am no longer dry. This weekend I was reminded that God is
good. I was reminded that none of this
is about me. It is about Him. He is faithful. He is at work through His Church. He will not fail. He is good!
As I look ahead, I am extremely
thankful for my friends who traveled great distances to be here this past
weekend. I am thankful for the members
of St. Andrew who prepared and shared meals, who offered words of
encouragement, who shared stories. I am
thankful to have shared this moment with them all. And I am thankful for God’s grace in the
midst of it all.
Thank you, Father. You have loved me and have called me your
son. That you have again reminded me
that You lead, You speak, You use us for your purposes. This isn’t about me. This isn’t about any of us. Not our capabilities (or lack thereof). Not our joy.
Not our energy. Not our
anything. This is about You, and you are…good.
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